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Friday, December 25, 2015

9 months review of Samsung Galaxy A7.

Salam alaik.

Haa. Dah masuk 9 bulan dah pakai Samsung Galaxy A7.

For those yg nk baca review asal boleh baca kat sini.

Now, for those yg tak tau. Mine was Android KitKat when I first use it, honestly time ni laju gila. Tekan je keluar, tekan je keluar. No lagging whatsoever. Mmg sgt osem.

As I have 13 GB for internal storage (I didn't put in my memory card because I have 2 sim cards), semuanya kelihatan osem dan cemerlang.

However, I updated to Lollipop. First time upgraded to this new Android OS, terpesona dengan graphic baru, transitional graphic dri one app to another mmg nampak kemas dan moden. Easier to call people sbb before this kena tekan button. Now, I can just slide on the name in phonebook dan boleh call. (For me this is new, sbb sebelum ni takleh).

Tapi.... after updating to Lollipop... Tetiba fon hang, kadang-kadang bila tekan laju-laju masa whatsapp or scrolling gmbar. Which is dissapointing. So, you guys, even dia ckp updatable to another OS, don't do it.

For me, takpelah tak lawa dari segi graphic asalkan bila tekan sana sini laju takde lagging.

Haa, for those yang maleh nk tengok previous post, boleh tengok full spec dari GSM arena kat sini.

Other than that, takde masalah. Terjatuh sekali dua tak  kacau apa-apa dari segi phone call quality, or gambar. So far, awesome and berbaloi. :)

So, keep on Samsung-ing it guys.


Thursday, December 24, 2015

It ended and I would say... it didn't end well.

Salam alaik..

Glad to say that I ended a 'whatever'ship that I had with someone. I even had the courage to confess about my feelings and he replied that, we can still be friends. I can text you, and be like it was before, but we can't go out because she wouldn't like it.

Well, I have my fair share of learning it is bad to be close to another person's love interest. It still does haunt me until this day. 

Pain? It is least of what I felt right now, what I felt is more to what should I do now? What can I do to make this better? How can I move on?

I don't blame him. I blame myself. For being so easy to like someone, someone that I can tell my problems to, someone that can watch me cry and forced me to eat because I haven't ate for 3 days, someone that I can depend on, someone that I'm excited to know how his day went on, and sadly, I can still support him when I knew that he's into someone else. 

For now, I'm praying that I can move on. Think on how can improve myself as a better person, and change myself to help me achieve my next year's goals. 


That's what I need the most right now. 

And I guess that's what he needs right now.

Thank you for everything and I hope you'll find what or who you seek. Amin. 

Thanks folks. :) 


Tuesday, December 22, 2015

i didn't know that

Salam alaik

If you can write about the mistakes that you've done and you wish that you could have known that, before you made that mistake?

Well... how I wish I can go back and undo that mistake.

Have you ever done a big mistake.. that made you feel uneasy and nervous everytime anything related to the mistake comes in front of you, or even if you read someone exposing the mistakes that other people had done to them.. and it's not even related to you... but it's quite similar. Does that makes your heart pound?

Well. I did.

One person said to me "Solat Malam. It helps"

For a while, it seems that it's hard for me to wake up in the middle of the night like I used to do. Maybe because my heart was already hardened and not ready for the "hidayah" or some people call it epiphany.

I wanted to change. I wanted to be better. I wanted to be the person I'm imagining  myself to be.

Please help, do not judge me. Just give me support.

Thanks for reading.

Love you guys.

about us governmental officers


Now it has been 12 months I've been working as Hygiene Inspector... not an easy task, but I'll manage.

Working under a lot of pressure.. and working with public is not easy.
for real.

I've heard before that people are always calling public servants like us are lazy, can't be changed or molded into something better, and will always stuck.. in other word... it's a DEAD END profession.

let me change your perception. that DEAD END job does not exist anymore.


Government officers are not lazy anymore. or precisely.. we can't afford to be lazy anymore. There's a huge job task been given at the beginning of the year, which does not includes emergency cases like floods or landslides.

For the fact that sometimes... there's some officers that does not work according to the job scope. Yes, THEY DO EXIST. But, we the real hardworking officers EXISTS TOO.

We are now expected to be dynamic, really good at communicating with public and other governmental agencies, and always expected to perform at our best everyday. Totally the same as the private sectors, yes, no difference.

The stigma.. yes, stigma that we have to live with everyday, as we are called public servants, we are often treated exactly like servants. People or the way we call it 'public', calling the office, making reports on everything (which is always welcomed) in a way that sometimes can't be accepted or tolerated. I've been called 'makan gaji haram', 'tak reti buat kerja', and a lot more. Harsh and vulgar words are normal to me right now. The only thing that makes me survive, is my friends (office friends). We support each other regardless.

About career growth.

It's your own choice. Yes, career growth is a little bit slow here. But I'm determined to move from government office to private organizations anytime I can,  because my main idea is to help people, and help myself grow in a sustainable direction. If the way to grow is by moving out, and try to expand my horizons, I'm willing to try.

If you want to grow within the government office, take up courses, like PTD, or masters, just to develop your mind, so you doesn't become stagnant or people nowadays calls it 'mereput'. 

Of course, not easy, but.... hard challenges shapes people better.

Well. Got to go now. I'll update more later.


Saturday, December 19, 2015

a new me

salam alaik

noting the day is at 18th december 2015... this is my 26th year of my life ..

i think i have to state down my target for next year... before it happens.. and just in case i have the chance to experience 2016....

before i start setting my goals for next year. just a little summary of my 2015.

-i was unemployed for 6 months
-went on 1 interview nearby home.. and got accepted.. (contract for 3 years term)
-worked like hell ( i even slept at landfill because there's some fire over there )
-liked someone and unlike someone
-went for interview for tenure position
-gained a lot of friends that would back me up if anything happens
-feels like relationship with cousins and family becomes closer
-able to give alms and buy what i want and need (*mostly what i want.. :) )
-open for 2016 challenges

My goals for next year

-write up some journal...
-try to begin my masters course
-finding someone worthy to take care of me
-start saving more than RM300 per month
-start spending money wisely (as I should have what i want by the end of the year)
-try to become fit and take care of my body better
-appreciates and understands nature better
-start saving for my own overseas vacation

*well. I don't put my religious goals here. I don't have to write that down. I have it on my mind all year long. :)

Well. All the best for you guys.

I really do apologize for everything I've done. And I hope that you have a really good year. Amin

Have fun!


Tuesday, May 26, 2015

well. i'm thankful it doesn't happen to me

salam alaik

woke up early today. a horrific dream happened to me today, and I can't sleep after that.

kita selalu baca orang Palestin, Iraq, Lubnan, Syria jadi tahanan dalam rumah sendiri. Penjahat (*baca Yahudi) masuk kedalam rumah, claiming it's their soil, and force you to get out of your own house. bukan selalu baca benda ni kita bayangkan diri kita dalam keadaan sedara-mara kita kat nun jauh sana tu. kita assume, okay kot. selamat kot. ada orang selamatkan kot. KOT.... the safe assumption, just because we don't know. or worst... don't really care.

last night, I dreamt of being a hostage in my own house. bayangkan, tengah chill hari ahad with family dalam rumah, tengah melayan anak-anak buah mewarna, mom and dad tengah bergurau, adik-beradik lain doing their own stuff dalam rumah. suddenly, a team of I don't know who, barged in... lengkap dengan senapang and magazines, and tetiba semua dah kena tahan.

me, and few others tersekat dalam bilik tepi yang penjahat tu x perasan. and like a movie, we got a gun. not knowing what will happen, my brother suggested that we kill ourselves. I was like... WHAT??

no time to explain, he shot my sister, and shot himself. I was left alone to decide. do I kill myself and just let this thing go. the chance to save other people in other room is a chance that I no longer have as an option.. I thought, well, I have no skills whatsoever, so it's dumb for me to fight those gun equipped team that has barged into my house.

the sad part is......


like seriously. all I thought was to get out of those stressful moments where I don't have a choice to save my family, and save myself from torture by killing myself.

and I did it.

before I shot myself in the head, I even asked myself, will god accept me to his heaven? because I know He won't accept people who killed himself. but I went through it anyway.

as I woke up. I cried. thinking that I have zero bravery, unlike my brothers and sisters in Syria and Palestine, they stayed strong, mempertahankan rumah sendiri and they chose not to kill themselves even though they had nothing to eat, and held hostage in their own homes.


if I am going to dream about it again...  I guess I would not kill myself, and try to save my family in the other rooms. yes, I have to. they are family. and I have to fight for them. not leaving them.

I'm sorry for the sad post. but when this happened it really makes you think. what are you going to do if you're faced with the same situation?


lagi sekali please... :* thank you

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